Re: Ms Dolly is BACK in Town!!!

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Posted by randleelivis (Ranked on Team Legacies (Pogo) Ladder) on March 01, 2018 at 15:03:02 PST:

In Reply to: Ms Dolly is BACK in Town!!! posted by JestaLoonie on December 06, 2017 at 18:11:26 PST:

: Merry Christmas from Our Miss Dolly
:

:
:

: As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking his list twice must be true, because every Christmas morning Jay's childrens stockings were overfilled, while his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty.

:
: One year, I decided to make his dream come true. I put on my sun glasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll.
: They DON'T sell those things at Walmart, ya know!!

: I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown.
: If you have never been to an X-rated store, then don't go!! You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like:
: ... " What does this do ?? "
: ... " You're kidding meeeeeee!! "
: ... "Who would ever buy that?? "

: Finally I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck, so I could use the car pool lane during rush hours.

: Finding what I wanted was difficult. Love dolls come in many different models. The top of the line, according to the side of the box could do many unusual things.

: I settled for "Loveable Louise".
: She was at the bottom of the price scale.
: To call Louise "a doll", took a huge leap of imagination.

: On Christmas Eve, with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after Santa had come and gone.

: I filled the dangling panty hose with Louise's pliant legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk that was on a nearby tray. Then I went home and giggled for a couple of hours.

: The next morning, my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left him a present that made him VERY HAPPY, but had left the dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more.

: We all agreed that Louise should remain in her panty hose, so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for our tradional Christmas dinner.

: My Grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door.
: "What the hell is that???, she asked.
: My brother quickly explained, "It's a doll."
: "Who would play with something like that??", Granny snapped.
: I had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut.
: "Where are her clothes???" , Granny continued.
: "Boyyyyyyyy the turkey sure smells nice!!" Jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room.
: But Granny was relentless. "Whyyyy doesn't she have any teeth??"
: Again I could of answered, but why would I. It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in
: the back of an ambulance saying, "Hang on Granny. Hang on!!"

:
: My Grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me whispering,
: "Heyyyyyyy who's the naked girl over by the fireplace?"
: I told him she was Jay's friend.
: A few minutes later, I noticed Grandpa over by the mantel talking to Louise.
: Not just talking, but actually flirting.
: It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home.

:
: The dinner went well. We made all the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying and who should be killed when suddenly Louise made a noise that sounded a lot like
: my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the panty house, flew around the room twice and landed in a heap in front of the sofa.

: The cat screamed.

: I passed cranberry sauce through my nose.

: Grandpa got up and ran across the room, fell to his knees and began adminstering mouth to mouth resuscitation.

: My brother fell back on the chair laughing and wet his pants.

: Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room and sat in the car.

: It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember!!

: Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh.

: Fortunately, thanks to that wonder drug called "duct tape", we restored her to perfect health.

: Louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies.

: I think Grandpa still calls her!!

WHY IS THERE NEVER ANY LOONIES REGED,I KEEP COMING IN BUT CAN'T GET A GAME, HOW DO I CHANGE MY TEAM????

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: : Merry Christmas from Our Miss Dolly : : : : : : : : As a joke, my brother used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking his list twice must be true, because every Christmas morning Jay's childrens stockings were overfilled, while his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty. : : : : One year, I decided to make his dream come true. I put on my sun glasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. : : They DON'T sell those things at Walmart, ya know!! : : I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. : : If you have never been to an X-rated store, then don't go!! You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like: : : ... " What does this do ?? " : : ... " You're kidding meeeeeee!! " : : ... "Who would ever buy that?? " : : Finally I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck, so I could use the car pool lane during rush hours. : : Finding what I wanted was difficult. Love dolls come in many different models. The top of the line, according to the side of the box could do many unusual things. : : I settled for "Loveable Louise". : : She was at the bottom of the price scale. : : To call Louise "a doll", took a huge leap of imagination. : : On Christmas Eve, with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours, long after Santa had come and gone. : : I filled the dangling panty hose with Louise's pliant legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk that was on a nearby tray. Then I went home and giggled for a couple of hours. : : The next morning, my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left him a present that made him VERY HAPPY, but had left the dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. : : We all agreed that Louise should remain in her panty hose, so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for our tradional Christmas dinner. : : My Grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. : : "What the hell is that???, she asked. : : My brother quickly explained, "It's a doll." : : "Who would play with something like that??", Granny snapped. : : I had several candidates in mind, but kept my mouth shut. : : "Where are her clothes???" , Granny continued. : : "Boyyyyyyyy the turkey sure smells nice!!" Jay said, trying to steer her into the dining room. : : But Granny was relentless. "Whyyyy doesn't she have any teeth??" : : Again I could of answered, but why would I. It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in : : the back of an ambulance saying, "Hang on Granny. Hang on!!" : : : : My Grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me whispering, : : "Heyyyyyyy who's the naked girl over by the fireplace?" : : I told him she was Jay's friend. : : A few minutes later, I noticed Grandpa over by the mantel talking to Louise. : : Not just talking, but actually flirting. : : It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home. : : : : The dinner went well. We made all the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying and who should be killed when suddenly Louise made a noise that sounded a lot like : : my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the panty house, flew around the room twice and landed in a heap in front of the sofa. : : The cat screamed. : : I passed cranberry sauce through my nose. : : Grandpa got up and ran across the room, fell to his knees and began adminstering mouth to mouth resuscitation. : : My brother fell back on the chair laughing and wet his pants. : : Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room and sat in the car. : : It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember!! : : Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. : : Fortunately, thanks to that wonder drug called "duct tape", we restored her to perfect health. : : Louise went on to star in several bachelor party movies. : : I think Grandpa still calls her!! : WHY IS THERE NEVER ANY LOONIES REGED,I KEEP COMING IN BUT CAN'T GET A GAME, HOW DO I CHANGE MY TEAM????

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