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      by USA on July 16, 2003 at 06:45:02 PDT

    Since the introduction of Dr. Seuss to our wonderful lobby the other morning, I felt it was appropriate to share this wonderful poem with all of you. Especially the ladies. =)




    Smiles2Send.com - A Dr. Seuss's Poem (A Woman's Version) - Funpages</title<p></head><p><body bgcolor="#000000" ><p><br><p align=center><p><br><p align=center><p><br><p align=center><br><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" border="0" align="center" height="89" width="515"><br><tr><br><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="1" border="0" align="center" height="60" width="468" bgcolor=black><br><tr><p><br><p align=center><p><table align=center border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="3"><br><tr><br> <td align=center><p><table align=center width=500 height=500 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=5 border=0 bgcolor="#FF0000"><br><tr><br><td align=center><p><div align="center"><br> <center><br> <table width=100% height=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=15 border=0 background="http://addicts.150m.com/satinbg01.jpg"><br><tr><br><td align=center><p><table align=center width=100% height=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=5 border=0 bgcolor="#FF0000"><br><tr><br><td align=center><br> <br><table align=center border="0" width=535 height=500 cellpadding="5" cellspacing="0" bgcolor="#FFFFFF"><br><tr><br><td><br><p> </td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><!-- start insert page here //--><p><table border=0 width=100% cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/dswv.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman02.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I'm glad I'm a woman...Yes I am, yes I am.<br><br>I don't live on Budweiser, beer, nuts, and Spam.<br><br>I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.<br><br>I won't drive to Hell before asking directions.<br><br>I act nice at parties; don't act like a clown;<br><br>And I know how to put the damn toilet seat down.<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman04.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman05.gif"><br></td><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#9900FF"><br>I won't grab your boobies;<br><br>I won't pinch your butt.<br><br>My belt is not hidden beneath my beer gut.<br><br>I don't go around re-adjusting my crotch;<br><br>or make sure my headboard bears<br><br>each hard-earned notch.<br><br>I don't belch in public;<br><br>don't scratch my behind.<br><br>I'm a woman, you see...<br><br>I'm just not that kind!<br><br></font><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I'm glad I'm a woman; So glad I could sing...<br><br>and thrilled I'm not covered in shag carpeting.<br><br>Hair won't grow from my ears, or cover my back.<br><br>And when I bend over, you can't see my crack.<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman06.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman01.gif"><br></td><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#9900FF"><br>I'm a woman, alas...and I'm proud, don't you see?<br><br>I'm blessed to have two boobs and squat when I pee.<br><br>I don't live for golf, or shoot basketball.<br><br>I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.<br><br></font><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><font size=3 face="comic sans ms" color="#FF0000"><br>I don't need male bonding; I don't cruise for chicks...<br><br>I'll never join the "Hair Club", or think with my *ick.<br><br>I'm a woman, by chance and thankful I am!<br><br>I'm so glad I'm a woman; not a man, yes I am!<br><br></font><br></td><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman07.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br></table><br><table border=0 width="*" cellspacing=1 align=center><br><tr><br><td align=center><br><img src="http://addicts.150m.com/woman03.gif"><br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br><tr><br><td><br> <br></td><br></tr><br></table><br></table><p></td><br></tr><br></table><br> <br></td><br></tr><br></table><p> </center><br></div><p></td><br></tr><br></table><p> </td><br> <br></body><br></html> <br></i></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> <div id="right_aux"> <div id="right_block_ad" class="container tar"> <a href="#"> <script type="text/javascript">showAd('ploader');</script> </a> </div> <div class="container"> <div id="league_admins" class="box2"> <div class="header"> <div>League Admins</div> </div> <div class="content" style="overflow: auto"> <table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"> <tr> <td> Mabono5 <i>(Head Admin)</i> </td> <td align="right">   </td> </tr> <tr> <td> nike1_td </td> <td align="right">   </td> </tr> <tr> <td> training </td> <td align="right">   </td> </tr> <tr> <td> ziasmum_td </td> <td align="right">   </td> </tr> <tr> <td> Jess_Cherie <i style="font-size: 11px">(Wife of Mabono)</i> </td> <td align="right">   </td> </tr> </table> </div> <div class="footer"> <span></span> </div> </div> </div> <div class="container"> <div class="box2"> <div class="header"> <div>League Tips</div> </div> <div class="content"> The Hall of Fame is updated once per day, so it could take up to 24 hours to see your name in lights if you have recently achieved Hall of Fame status. </div> <div class="footer"> <span></span> </div> </div> </div> <div class="container"> <div class="box2" id="upgrade_membership"> <div class="header"> <div>Upgrade Membership</div> </div> <div class="content" id='upgrade_membership_content'> <img src="//img.igl.net/images/coins.jpg" class="image" style="padding-top:5px;" alt="coins" /> <ul class="actions dividers bullets mini_list"> <li> <a href="/tdtraining/premium?utm_source=index&utm_medium=text&utm_content=premium&utm_campaign=static">Gold Membership</a> </li> <li> <a href="/tdtraining/premium?utm_source=index&utm_medium=text&utm_content=premium&utm_campaign=static" >Platinum Membership</a> </li> <li> <a href="/tdtraining/premium?utm_source=index&utm_medium=text&utm_content=premium&utm_campaign=static" >Diamond Membership</a> </li> <li class="last"> <a href="/tdtraining/premium?utm_source=index&utm_medium=text&utm_content=premium&utm_campaign=static">VIP Membership</a> </li> </ul> <div class="cb"> </div> </div> <div class="footer"><span> </span></div> </div> </div> <div class="container"> <div id="recent_ladderbux_redem" class="box2"> <div class="header"> <div>LadderBux Redemptions</div> </div> <div class="content"> <div> <div style="padding:3px; 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